Which frog will never be a prince?
They told Emily she might have to kiss a few frogs but little did she know there would be so many. Unprepared, she wandered into the swamp, blissfully unaware of the perils to come-- as onwards, upwards, and across pond after pond she persevered.
Perhaps you might help Emily avoid the most treacherous of these deceptive reptiles.
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Allesandro the Vampire Hunter
Could poor Emily escape the "complications" brought on by his manliness or the very deep "hearted" desire he has to wed only those who are of the same "blood" so to speak?
Tony the Whiner
His tears created the pond now referred to as the pond of "I can't be away from my child over a weakness… uh… week."
Kalon the Bellman
He refused to carry her all of her baggage and profusely insisted she wait for instructions when she desired to address his highly esteemed self.
Ryan the "Everyone Else is a "girly-man" Personal Trainer
This guy actually told her not to gain weigh; he wouldn't touch a "lazy fat woman." And he has seemingly intimated to his "un-womanly" bachelor buddies that the "Bachelor" family would be well advised to offer him his own Bachelor show. Really Ryan? Emily run for your wart removal cream after kissing this one!
How could we forget…no I will never forget this one.
Bentley the Divine
He was on Ashley Spivey's Bachelorette show, so terribly disturbed that Ashley wasn't Emily, he applied 27 hair products instead of the usual 24. Eventually a puddle of them dribbled down upon the floor and he very nearly drowned (we can't verify this, it's only a rumor but it makes sense eh?)
And so there you have it, for now at least. We'll post the results after next weeks show!